From Wasted to Resourceful: Top 10 Natural Hangover Remedies

What did I do last night? And where am I?

I seem to get assigned a lot of the beer and booze stories on Greenopolis. I don’t know why. I do make my own hard cider but I really don’t drink all that much. Really, I don’t. Yes, I know denial is one of the 10 warning signs, smart guy. Anyway, this is about what to do after you’ve imbibed too much. The morning after—the dreaded hangover. Aspirin, acetaminophen, and ibuprofen can actually add to your woes by thinning your blood, stressing your stomach and taxing your liver. What are the most natural ways you can turn your wasted body back into a vital resource? Here are 10 suggestions we gleaned cruising the web, holding an ice pack to our heads.

Water. I know you want to just flush yourself down the toilet right about now. But flush your body with water instead. Alcohol dehydrates, water rehydrates. Drink it before, during and after your binge. You can add a dash of salt, lemon and sugar to it to help with electrolytes. When in doubt, drink. Water only, hold the bourbon…

Mustard. Mustard helps stimulate circulation and draw out toxins form that pickled liver of yours. Skip the sausage; just mix some mustard powder into your bath. Wasabi works well too. Add some mineral salts, camphor and eucalyptus to ramp up the effect.

Massage. Get a good foot or body massage. The outer edge of the right foot reflexes into the liver, and a general massage will help your aching body to flush away the metabolic toxins of all those Cosmos.

Yoga. According to Planet Green, twisting yoga poses help squeeze the alcohol out of your tissues like water from a towel. Here’s the Seated Twist they offer. The “getting out of bed” part may be the hardest.

• Get out of bed and sit on the floor with your legs extended straight in front of you.

• Bend your left knee and cross your leg over your right, placing your left foot on the floor beside the outside of your right knee.

• Rotate your torso to the left so you are twisting your body.

• Bring your right arm across your body and place your right hand on the floor beside your left butt cheek. Use this arm to help you twist even more.

• Inhale big belly breaths. Hold the pose for 30 seconds. Switch sides.      

Wheat Grass juice. Next time you want to do shots, do shots of wheatgrass. Full of chlorophyll, it’s deodorizing, wound healing, maintains ph, good for the guts, and showers you with antioxidants and enzymes to get you back on your feet. Drink a glass before you turn in and another when you arise. Then go mow the lawn.

Eat your veggies. Fresh greens, broccoli, beets, peppers are loaded with B vitamins which can help you process the alcohol. Asparagus has enzymes that boost booze breakdown. The French swear by artichokes. Ginger is helpful for nausea and upset stomach. Not ginger brandy.

Fruit and juices too. Juices with Vitamin C help break down alcohol in the body, which is where you put a lot of it last night. Orange and grapefruit juice have vitamin C and sugar, or try tomato juice with cayenne, sugar and lime. Skip the gin.

Coffee. Actually not the best- if you drink it before bed, it interferes with the sleep you need, and dehydrates you further. The caffeine can stimulate and relive headache pain, however, so maybe it can be part of a larger hangover program.

Heat packs, aromatherapy, tiger balm. Wrap your aching head in a nice warm moist towel, rub your temples and forehead with tiger balm and inhale some aromatherapy oils of lavender or peppermint.  Phone in sick to work.

If these 10 don’t do the trick, you can always take Steve Martin’s advice: Sit naked on a block of cheese and swallow a live mouse. If that doesn’t bring you around, nothing will.

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